help wanted
something we all do at some point is think about the type of person we want to end up with. everyone always says the same thing, has to be smart, funny, and blah blah on down the line. so, im going to list my dream girl requirement. note: this is not at all a binding list, should someone pop up that is the antithesis to all this crap, so be it.
1) must be british: ala elizabeth hurley, ala keira knightly, ala who ever else. seriously, you could be telling me off in the worst way, but if its in a british accent, ill do something nice for you, make you a keesh perhaps. i will settle for just about any european country if not british. it means sweet vacations to places i know nothing about.
2) audrey hepburn-ish: this stems entirely from the recent gap ad with ms. hepburn dancing to ac/dc. its quite adorable.
3) goof: everyone always says smart and funny, and yeah those are great, but at least some of the time, you have to be friggin stupid. tell me a joke that makes me wonder why im even hanging out with you. and then ill remember writing this and ill say "oh yeah.."
4) fond of flying: kind of goes without saying, but i had to say it. if you go and buy a book about airplane ownership there is usually a passage in it that mentions the WAF factor or wife-acceptance-factor. no joke. so she has to love airplanes and be willing to fly in them. small ones. upside down.
5) must weigh less than i do: everyone has their taste. alot of people would call this shallow. its not, so get over it. i cant fall for someone that im not attracted to can i? nope, and i wouldnt expect you to. and by weigh less than me, i do me significantly, not by a pound or two.
thats it for now, im not going to go into things like hair color or things, those are incidental and you can always change them anyway. have i reached a new level of vain. nah, just know what i dig.
1) must be british: ala elizabeth hurley, ala keira knightly, ala who ever else. seriously, you could be telling me off in the worst way, but if its in a british accent, ill do something nice for you, make you a keesh perhaps. i will settle for just about any european country if not british. it means sweet vacations to places i know nothing about.
2) audrey hepburn-ish: this stems entirely from the recent gap ad with ms. hepburn dancing to ac/dc. its quite adorable.
3) goof: everyone always says smart and funny, and yeah those are great, but at least some of the time, you have to be friggin stupid. tell me a joke that makes me wonder why im even hanging out with you. and then ill remember writing this and ill say "oh yeah.."
4) fond of flying: kind of goes without saying, but i had to say it. if you go and buy a book about airplane ownership there is usually a passage in it that mentions the WAF factor or wife-acceptance-factor. no joke. so she has to love airplanes and be willing to fly in them. small ones. upside down.
5) must weigh less than i do: everyone has their taste. alot of people would call this shallow. its not, so get over it. i cant fall for someone that im not attracted to can i? nope, and i wouldnt expect you to. and by weigh less than me, i do me significantly, not by a pound or two.
thats it for now, im not going to go into things like hair color or things, those are incidental and you can always change them anyway. have i reached a new level of vain. nah, just know what i dig.
posted by Chris Porter at 7:59 PM
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